looking for a driver

[surpriseitsclarence]

Subject: looking for a driver
Date: Feb 16th
Time: 1:09 AM
By: 002 - 0001

hey
pssst
you there

youre pretty lonely arent you?
thats why youre turning to the internet to drown out all those mean voices in your head
wouldnt it be nice if you had a voice OUTSIDE of your head?
one thats a little more friendly?

:)

my job means I get to visit bars all over this fine city of ours
places where the lighting is bad on purpose
(if you catch my drift)
the only problem is that Im not so good at driving

mind giving me a ride?
we can talk about all sorts of things
whether pigeons are getting bolder lately
what day of the week it feels like (it never feels right does it)
the crushing weight of existence and how sometimes it sits in your chest but other times it feels like sitting in a cold bath and one by one your body parts go numb until you wonder whether you ever had a body at all
taxes

so what are you waiting for?
give your new buddy clarence a call
see what happens next ;)

Comments

[surpriseitsclarence]

arent you going to call me weird and off-putting?

you see
theres usually a song and dance with these kinds of things
I say something disturbing
you say "oh clarence"
I disarm you with sage advice that could also be a confession about my dark and mysterious past
eventually we circle around to something that almost looks like friendship
(except neither one of us really trusts the other)
not sure how I feel about skipping those steps in the middle

[anelli]

Don't you think that only a certain kind of weird and off-putting person is going to respond with a sincere ride offer?
So why point out a rude truth? You are weird and off-putting. So what of it?

I also had assumed we were going to be having these kinds of discussions in the car.

[surpriseitsclarence]

...

I guess it cant hurt to spend time with a fellow weirdo
should be more interesting than kicking back with some guy who wont stop whinging about his mother in law

[anelli]

Now you get it, Clarence.
So I take it you're accepting my offer?
Just let me know where and when I should pick you up.