PLEES HELP

[delaurentiis]

Subject: PLEES HELP I NEED HELP
Date: feb 8
Time: 0400
By: 1293-996

helo i am in serch of my aqantence and roommayte, laslo cravenswroth

he has not returened home in many dayes wich is not uncomon for him but i am growin realy realy conserned becasue of upcomin sesonal events

the time of the Superb Owl is aproching and i am afriad it may have CAPTCHURED laslo as a sacrfice and it might have him in the cluches of its beek

or he cud just be fuckin aboot becasue he is a realy big lazy bonse

pleese if you see him let him no that nandor is loking for him and that i am angrey and i am comign for him

i have attatched an emage of him so you may lewk for him

[Attached: OWL.JPEG]

Comments

619 - 2113

[godfragment]

I've heard that owls are harbingers of death and bad luck. Hopefully your friend hasn't already been consumed by this 'superb owl'. I hope you find him.

[delaurentiis]

his deth will be a mercey if i get my hams on him

[godfragment]

Hams??

Why are you angry with him for being attacked by a large and terrifying owl? Is he prone toward getting into scrapes like this?

555 – 1235

[demotivating]

You know, there are so many people who don't turn up to work the next day, that they've given it the name "Super Sick Monday".

[delaurentiis]

becuz of the oul?

[demotivating]

Owl.

And there's nothing else happening this time of year to coincide. Super Sick Monday claims another victim. Along with 26 million other people that get hit by it. Compare that to flu which is only 120k a day, there's a clear winner.

222 - 1879

[recreatable]

[ Obviously this is an eight-year-old, so he'll treat it as such: ]

Nandor --

Wow. Did you draw that sketch yourself? It's [ ... ] got a lot of potential.

[delaurentiis]

[He is seven-hundred and eighty-six years old and finally someone is speaking to him appropriately.]

yesS,
i skeched it from mamary

[recreatable]

That's nice.

[ grimacing... ]

But perhaps it might be more helpful if you gave a description instead. For the less artistically minded.

560 – 1616

[stations]

Wait, sorry, can we go back to the part about the owl?

[delaurentiis]

haf you seene it?

[stations]

No, should I have? Does this city have an owl problem? What was that part about sacrifices?

666-3473

[satanicpanics]

what makes the owl superb exactly??

[ He's about to make the Superb Owl something in his next D&D campaign... ]

[delaurentiis]

it is the larjest and greytist oul of all time. it laes larj eggs.

[satanicpanics]

uh huh
just how larj and greyt are we talking here?

737 – 9012

[diametrically]

Is that your friend or the owl?

[delaurentiis]

my frend is laslo cravenswroth

[diametrically]

I know, you said that
Is the picture you included your friend or the owl?

1083 – 706

[deliverant]

well, you wouldn't forget his face that's for sure ...

[ listen, he's trying to be nice! ]

ive never seen an owl that big ... but the important question is how big is your friend?

[delaurentiis]

abowt two and a haff larj owls toll.

[deliverant]

right, right ...

[ sir he has never seen an owl irl ]

so ... taller than you?

[soul_sight]

well that's concerning. can you tell us more about this owl? should we all be concerned that it could take people? Also is that a picture of your friend or the owl?

[He does not know what an owl is. ]

611 - 3918

[micycle]

[ ........ ]

are you five

[ Because he spells like it. ]